Operation Turista (Part 2)



9:39AM    Subjects Jack & Jill leave room, enter dining room for breakfast. Mood is pleasant and friendly upon casual greeting. However, instead of the standard ‘Good Morning’, Subjects greet with ‘Hail Hq’tar’.


10:41AM   Jack & Jill leave dining room and head back to our lodgings.


11:04AM   Jack & Jill leave Warren’s B&B without addressing myself or any other folk within building. Surveillance switched to outside Agents.


11:32AM   Jack & Jill enter City Centre. Walk through Hoglands Park and settle for a period of 24 minutes on a bench within Palmerston Park. Subjects are noted to be looking at a map with confusion, but are otherwise in good spirits.


12:27PM   Jack & Jill, after 31 minutes of wandering around Above Bar Street & High Street, enter café on East Street. We enter and take seat within listening distance, and note that Jack & Jill talk about their surroundings. Strong note is made of how they’ve ‘never heard’ of several places and landmarks in Southampton, nor the city itself. Propose that Southampton is a ‘new place recently built’. Jack jokes that ‘maybe Hq’tar sent us here’ and that he would ‘ask Mayor Crest’.


13:09PM   Jack & Jill leave café, and spend next 162 minutes walking a circuit down High Street, toward Ocean Village, before circling back to the City Centre via Bernard Street & Queensway.


16:34PM   Whilst viewing an antique shop, Jack looks at watch and immediately becomes slightly agitated. Once Jill notices this, she too enters a state of distress, before Jack attempts to calm her down. Both subjects then make their way back to Warren’s B&B at a swift pace.


17:06PM   Jack & Jill enter Warren’s B&B and exchange pleasantries with Mr Warren. They leave him with a ‘Hail Hq’tar’, before going up to their room where they remain for the rest of the evening.



Observation Reports #2-#4 follow a similar pattern, with Jack & Jill’s behaviour simulating that of tourists with a high intrigue over their surroundings. Conversations overhead by Agents Patterson & Furner suggest nothing out of the ordinary, with the only language of interest being the phrase ‘Hail Hq’tar’ using as an exclamation.

The only item of interest that did arise was after Observation Report #4, when Mr Warren received a letter for posting from Jill, with additional comments praising the security of the B&B. The letter was intercepted by Agent Butcher and is transcribed below, along with the anomalous address.


Henrietta West

67 Cornell Lane



WH1 5∑µ


Dearest Henry


We are writing to you from a lovely, if incredibly badly protected, bed & breakfast in the city of Southampton. Now, before you tell me there isn’t such a place, I assure you there is, and both Richard & myself were as surprised as you were. Allow me to explain…


As you know, we were planning to spend a week in South Exham, but after falling asleep on the train (Richard was supposed to keep us awake!), we awoke to find ourselves arriving in this Southampton place. Thinking there was some error on the signage, we alighted and made our way into the city, looking to find somewhere to rest our heads before sundown came.


Now, I will confess, I subscribe to your theory that the night terrors are located specifically in Wilthaven, but you know what Richard is like! Anyway, after a brief moment of panic, we found this delightful place to stay and paid for 6 nights, although the man in charge became a bit rude upon Richard providing the fee. He kept muttering something about Milton’s face being there instead of ‘the Queen’. Most peculiar.


As I say, the place was very poorly secured, with no shutters adorning the windows. Unfortunately, it was too late for us to venture out, even though the owner told us he would be open until at least 11PM! Perish the thought! All that said, though, we had a wonderful nights sleep, the best in I don’t know how long.


Southampton itself is very nice. Lots of strange brands and shops here, but I’m assuming they are having some sort of festival, hence the change in the city’s name. Richard has calmed down a lot (that’s what a good nights sleep will do to a man!), and we’ve spent the last couple of days looking around these curious places, and taking it all in.


You simply must come yourself one day, as it is a fine break from the screams and horribleness we have to endure back home. Still, mustn’t grumble, as Mayor Crest says, otherwise we will end up like that poor Cherry boy. Has he returned yet?


Send my love to Simon and the children!


Hail Hq’tar!




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